And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Randomize
