ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Randomize
