Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
