lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
