margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
I wish they made helmets for livers.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
Randomize
