I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Randomize
