one might say we're banned from that church
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize