I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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