dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
he's gonorrhea incarnate
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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