your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize
