My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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