we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Randomize
