I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
I queefed so loud it echoed.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Randomize
