She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
