I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
My vagina just recognized that song.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Randomize
