So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
