Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Randomize
