He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Boobs are out for the taking
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
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