Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Randomize