Kiss
Puke
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize
