so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
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