At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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