Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
