You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
