Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
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