And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
