i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
