I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
