I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Randomize
