Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
