Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Randomize
