I bet he comes in French.
there was a trapeze. enough said
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Randomize
