you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Why did my mother make you get naked?
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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