I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize