The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
