if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
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