I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
