Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Randomize
