You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
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