What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
