Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
Randomize
