we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Your cock deserves a montage
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Randomize
