her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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