Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Randomize
