Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize
