I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
