The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
