Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
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