Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
handjob tips. give me some.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
Randomize