super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
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