I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
i think i have herpe
just one?
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Randomize